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110 cards

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I'm Sorry Stephanie... we're out of stock. But I could maybe get it to you for the 29th?Colin felt lucky that Santa and his reindeer...
...had been in a hurry
Merry Christmas peasants!Merry Christmas
4 Calling Birds, 3 French Hens, 2 Turtledoves and a Partridge in a Pear Tree... Now that's what Tom called a Christmas Dinner!
Christmas... with CattitudeThe Muppets Christmas
To my wife I got a Playstation for the kids... it seemed like a good swap to meTo Mum and Dad... from your chick
Simon, I told you it wasn't chocolate on the reindeer's bum!Merry Christmas
Melinda was looking forward to serving Christmas dinner to her vegetarian relatives.
Just when the sprouts thought they were safe on the shelf for another night...
,,,the Grim Reducer appearedIt's a Kind offer Stanley but I haven't got a Christmas tree, so I don't need my bush decorating with your balls!
The Christmas Pudding had mysteriously disappeared... and for some inexplicable reason Norris found himself in the frame!BAH! HUMBUG! Merry Christamas!
The Muppets ChristmasTo my Sister Another Christmas...and lots of presents you can't wait to exchange
To my Boyfriend Its Christmas and lucky old me...I pulled a cracker!Naughty boys don't get anything for Christmas.
For 364 days of the year she is a respected business woman. Fortunately for Karen, Christmas comes but once a year.When his wife said stuff the turkey. Eddie agreed... and went down the pub
So you'll never call Santa a Fat Git to his face again will you!Patience, Smudge... We just have to wait until they're all pissed and the leftovers will be ours for taking!
Christmas? Wake me up when it's all over! Merry Christmas!The Muppets Christmas
After he'd asked if she fancied a bit of 'ding dong merrily on high' she replied 'only if you fancy a knee in the baubles'...he couldn't recall singing a carol by that name before?Merry Christmas to my favourite Aunt Sally ...well apart from 'Ant' arctica of course
Bad Santa - SANTA was sure he could feel someone's icy fingers fiddling with his sackThe Office Christmas Party was in full swing. Merry Christmas Bobby
At the Christmas party, Eddie got smashed, Brandon got pickled...
...and Olly got completely pithedLook Santa, send me a BIKE or the puppy gets it!
Pooh Bear, Piglet, Rabbit and Eeyore... Tigger was running out of friends to have for Christmas dinner!The Muppets Christmas
If he didn't get her what she wanted... it wasn't just snowballs she would be grabbingI'm dreaming of a white Christmas... and I'm dreaming of a beach in Fuengirola
Bad Santa - I want a Wii  Well don't do ig on me David, you dirty little gitSanta was beginning to regret his decision to let Rudolph go. Merry Christmas Richard
It was Christmas morning in the Johnson's kitchen and the sage and onions were looking at a fate... ...even worse than a fate worse than death''What's the worst thing you ever had for Christmas?''
Relatives!
It appeared Charlie wasn't too impressed with what Santa had left in his stocking! Merry Christmas!The Muppets Christmas
Urg! Timmy. Sprout Time!Its Christmas again, that time when you eat and drink so much... you don't see your toes 'til March
Bad Santa - The old geezerMerry Christmas Mary. For some reason, the kids were always well behaved at Grandma's.
At the Bramley's Christmas party... the au pear did her usual impression of St KnickerlessMuch as Rebecca loved FRESH FRUIT, the unwrapped apple Jeffrey gave her for Christmas smacked of being just another of his last minute panic buys!
Charlie loved playing snowballs with the Children ...about as much as he enjoyed having his balls being licked by next-door's Rottweiler!Paul, Every Christmas I can literally see myself... getting fatter by the minute!
To my Daddy... I love you more than ChristmasBad Santa - Santa remembered when all Mrs.Cravens wanted for Christmas were her two front teeth.  Now the greed cow wanted a FULL SET with extra grips!
To Mum, Merry Christmas. The outside caterers had done their bit. Now she could get well and truly hammered.Eddie went out on the piste at Christmas...
...and got really smashed
Yeah mate... there was that real good year when I worked with ALED JONES then the offers just stopped coming in !For my darling HUSBAND this CHRISTMAS...with your ruggedly handsome good looks and oh so kissable lips... who needs mistletoe!
Bah Humbeg! Merry Christmas BarrySON Hope this Christmas... brings all your dream of
Bad Santa - Good grief, is he going to recite the COMPLETE toy section from the Argos catalogue?OK so it's all agreed. Stuff the kids, let's have this year off. Merry Christmas Julie and Andrew
The asparagus sisters happily got their tips out for the lads...
...to pose in the Christmas colanderJim got the wrong idea when his wife said she needed more support with the CHRISTMAS DINNER
Merry Christmas Dad... Christmas always brings out dad's carefree, fun-loving and charasmatic personality!!!Turkey for Christmas Jeff?...prefer Spain myself!
After hearing a drunken declaraion from Brian in accounts that he wanted to shag a reindeer... Susan had come up with a cunning plan.As usual, Arthur turned up for the Christmas party...
...already half cut
Natalie wondered if the message, 'Take me to bed and roger me senseless', in Timothy's card was Christmassy enoughRex wasn't convinced that there was a verse in the carol that went...'Silent night, dogs are shite!'
Merry Christmas. Chris soon got into the Christmas spirit...by preparing his letter of resignation for the morningTo Mum Merry Christmas! Fortunately for Mum, Christmas comes but once a year.
After the nightmare of last year...
...the sage and onion told the turkey family they could stuff this year's inviteShe was always full of Christmas Spirit... this year it was Vodka!
Sammy realised...his b*ll*cks were frozen to the ice!For  you SON. Having ordered 4 calling birds and 3 french hens off that dodgy christmas web-site. Bobby decided that all his Christmases had come at once
All John Lemon wished for at Christmas... was peas on earth.Anne got a skipping Rope for Christmas and she made up a song to go with it
Fred was about to discover... there is always some ice hole that ruins your Christmas!Merry Christmas. Christmas: gifts you don't want, queues everywhere, crap telly, family arguments and hangovers... and all for £3000!
The Vegetarians were delighted with their Christmas selection box...When Jamie shouted for Marjorie to come and check if his large red balls were hanging evenly, she'd naturally assumed he was decorating the Christmas tree!
Where's my bike Santa, you miserable, fat git!Merry Christmas Edward. Edward always put a determined effort into buyinghis family's Christmas presents
Eddie could have sworn he'd recieved the same present last year...After seeing what a pile of crap Richard bought her for Christmas, Suzy farted on his present
Ralph was sure he'd asked for a bitch in fishnets.It was the countdown to Christmas and the pressure was on for Sandra: food, presemts,decorations, cards, stress! It was now August after all!
Normally a good mixer at Christmas, the bitter lemon told the sage and the onion... to go and get stuffedWell, that was HER FAMILY sorted.  Now to the Pound Shop to buy presents for the IN-LAWS!
"Dear Santa, I've been a really bad pussy all year and I don't deserve any presents...It was 3 o'clock on Christmas Eve and... town was full of the usual last-minute shoppers! Merry Christmas
As she got ready for the Christmas party, the orange put on her best cloves...Dirk's wife was so pleased with the BLOUSE he got her las year that he'd wrapped it up AGAIN for THIS Christmas!
Fluffy thought having a large bow stuck to her fur was undignified enough until she saw the Christmas Fairy... with a tree stuffed up her bum!Rudolf decided if Santa said, "it looks like rain dear" one more time... he's sleigh him.
It had been a successful day's Christmas shopping, now all she had to do was get present for everyone else!4 calling birds, 3 French hens, 2 turtledoves and a partrige in a pear tree
The Vegetarian's chum had obviously been round on Christmas eve... and played a bit of a practical jokeLisa was always full of CHRISTMAS SPIRIT, this year it was Vodka!
As soon as Rex and Rover heard the relatives were coming for Christmas... they were off!This year, the Queen's Peach was full of festive cheer...
Jones attempted to appear cool, calm and in control...Mrs Bramley wondered if her husband would fancy Turkey again for Christmas...
Jasper thought about tying the tinsel around his knobOn Christmas eve, Eddie wrapped the prosthetic leg he'd bought for Edwina as a stocking filler...
Party Poppers, streamers, tinsel. Humphrey's face said it all... he was having a fantastic christmasThe walnut wasn't sure whether this was just a splitting headache or something a little more serious...
At the office Christmas party, even the photocopier got totally hammered...The carrots were so excited about Santa and Rudolf coming, they just couldn't get to sleep...
Eddie was horrified when his German cousin told him his Christmas cake was stollen...Take care this Christmas Kevin - don't roast your chestnuts on an open fire
Christmas took an awful lot out of the Couch-Potatoes...And the sprouts had been so looking forward to a nice day off this Christmas...

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